Recognizing The Signs Of Domestic Abuse

GOLDEN TRIANGLE, Miss. (WCBI) – Domestic violence is in every community. We’ve also seen high profile incidents this year, including a deadly shooting at Wal-mart in Starkville.

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence says about 20 people per minute are physically abused by a partner.

“I say that you just have to build you’re strength up and do what’s best for you,” said Lucy.

It’s a lesson this domestic violence victim recently learned. She doesn’t want to be identified, but we will call her “Lucy,” for this story.

Lucy’s traumatizing moment came after a simple walk away from her house.

“After I took my baby to the park, I came home and he began to jump on me. He ended up, the next day, threatening me saying he was going to come to my job and kill me. I pretended like I had to go to work at a certain time, to get away from him. I did go to work but I went to my manager and told her I needed some help,” said Lucy.

Eventually, Lucy got away. She called Safe Haven to help her escape.

“An individual does not have to stay in an abusive situation. There is help,” exclaimed Safe Haven Licensed Counselor Kenya Walker.

Less than a month into 2018, several domestic situations in North Mississippi have turned deadly, including in Lee County and a shooting at the Starkville Wal-mart.

“Its very heart breaking because the help was always there for her,” said Walker.

Walker says the signs of abuse show up way before the act of violence and it’s important to recognize them.

“Having to check in with your partner repeatedly, having to watch your time and letting them know about your where about when you’re leaving and how long you will be gone. Also always apologizing for just the slightest infarction or mistake , low self esteem, alienation from family and friends, issues with making decisions without the partner,” said Walker.

Walker says if you want to get out of an abusive situation, rely on law enforcement and always document each situation.

“If you go to the police make sure that you are pressing charges because if you are going to seek the help of an attorney, that document is permanent in getting out of that situation,” said Walker.

“Lucy” learned the signs of abuse, after arriving at Safe Haven, and how to start over.

“When I tell you they was a blessing to me because I was stressed, I didn’t know where I was going to go, I didn’t know what to do. It was very hard and they made it so easy for me,” said Lucy.

Nearly 10,000 women and men are impacted by domestic violence every year.